Insights
Relational Intelligence™, psychology, and leadership insight for couples, entrepreneurial women, and high-capacity leaders.
Every week I publish new essays on Relationships.
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Money Doesn’t Mean the Same Thing to Both of You
“Two people can look at the same financial reality and experience something entirely different—because money carries meaning long before a couple makes a decision about what to do with it.”Two people can look at the exact same amount of money and experience completely...
Relational Safety: Intention, Experience, and the Conditions for Honest Participation
Two people can experience the same relationship very differently. Explore how intention, lived experience, and repeated responses influence what people feel safe to say, challenge, reveal, and contribute—in marriage, leadership, and professional partnerships.
Relational Capacity Under Conditions of Sustained Achievement
A couple can build a successful life that leaves little capacity for the relationship itself. Explore why commitment and emotional availability are different—and how the structure of professional, entrepreneurial and family life influences what two people can bring to one another.
Competence, Authority and Dependency in Relational Systems
Being indispensable can become part of a person’s identity—and part of the relationship’s structure. Discover how competence, responsibility, authority and dependency can create patterns that leave one partner overwhelmed and the other increasingly disengaged, even when both want change.
From Individual Leadership to Relational Leadership
“Why professional competence doesn’t automatically create shared leadership in marriage.”Two accomplished people can be exceptional leaders professionally and still struggle to lead together in their relationship. They may build companies, manage substantial...
Beyond Self-Awareness: From Individual Insight to Relational Intelligence
“Understanding yourself is not the same as understanding what happens between you and another person.”Self-awareness has become a central aspiration of modern personal development. We learn to recognize our triggers, understand our histories, identify attachment...
Entrepreneurial Risk as Relational Risk
“Shared Consequence, Individual Ambition and Decision Authority in Entrepreneurial Partnerships”Entrepreneurship is built around risk. Capital is committed before outcomes are certain. Opportunities require decisions before all the information is available. Time is...
Beyond Accumulation: Wealth, Choice and the Relational Construction of “Enough”
“Financial success can reduce constraint without answering a more consequential question: What is the wealth intended to make possible?”Financial necessity makes many decisions for us. Resources are finite. Obligations are clear. Certain choices simply aren't...
Financial Power in Intimate Partnerships
“Shared money does not automatically create shared power. Financial power is shaped by who can influence what a couple's resources make possible.”Two people can call it our money. Both names may be on the accounts. Both may have access. Major decisions may...
When the Relationship That Worked Before Doesn’t Work Anymore
“As people, roles, responsibilities, and circumstances change, the relationship that once worked beautifully may need to evolve with them.”There is a particularly confusing moment that can happen in a long-term relationship. Nothing is obviously wrong. You still...